Life lately

a hat I knitted for the bf's niece

So what have I been doing lately? A whole lot of knitting. I've had one interview, but that's about it. Well, I went through a rough time last weekend over the surgery. I was really upset because I was poorly medicated (that never helps) and was crying my eyes out over the fact that I'll never have children. I don't freaking want kids and I was a mess over it anyway. And then night before last I was a mess because I looked at my wedding pictures. It's hard not getting upset by it... it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, and it was all a waste. It was the major event leading to the most painful and miserable time of my life. Anyway, whatever. I am very happy with where I am in my life now (except the unemployment). I am deeply in love, and it fills my heart with more joy than I've known in many many years. I'm terrified of meeting the bf's family though. We're going up to St. Louis around Thanksgiving, and I'm not really worried about how most of his family will like me. Just his mom (who's actually his stepmom). She sounds like she won't like me one bit. Especially after he tells her how we met (nope, they don't know about that yet...). I foresee a few whispered conversations about how wrong I am for him. *Sigh*